Soul said to me O you who have been busy by Fatamorgana world ..... What you want to search from the world ...? Look ... there is no person who look you Lights also are reluctant to brighten your Yourself yourselves in the morning Allah fed up with sin sin your megrim ............... You to worship Him But you also engage in immoral acts to him Are you sure your pray received by him? Do you believe in your repentance by His goodness? Cry yourself weeping with sorrow Throughout the life

Sunday, October 4, 2009

testament to the women apostles

Once we are satisfied with our postings about women, the complementary bit we want to add something ..
@ At the Farewell Pilgrimage, hajj separation between Rosululloh Saw the flock, he delivered berorasi last messages. Among the last message he is, will that be gentle on her, giving the rights of their lives, the rights to education. Also to always loved the ladies. Is there seagung personally instructed him to like it? Eternal message of all time.

@ Rosululloh had one day to go to the mosque holding his female descendants. Abil Sy.Umamah bint ash. What was he doing in front of friends? He was praying while holding the little girl. If the ruku ', he put it, when standing, he took profit held back. Is there a person who appreciates his seagung woman like that?

@ Rosululloh is Abul Banat, all the children who grew up, is that the girls. 4 girls, mother of Fatima, mother Zainab, ruqoyyah bunda, bunda Urn Kulthum. Rosul lovingly educate them, raise them. Yet the social conditions of the world as it is very demeaning women everywhere. Then, if we are not copying Rosululloh, we want to imitate anyone?

@ Do not ever try to harass women, respect them. Including the value it is not her in the issues of emancipation and feminism in the wrong direction and was deliberately formatted to trap women.

@ Women and men are not created except to each side to work in a field of life. If a man cultivate their ground, planting seedlings, sowing the seeds. So she chose and sorting the seeds, watering and cleaning of the wild plants that interfere with

@ Kullu dzati shidarin, kholah; each wearing a bra, is kita.saudara maternal aunt. Then, the child does not like to see her mother happy? Which child is not jealous and angry if an aunt in alone.?

@ What a true Rosululloh: (istaushuu bin-nisa-i.... Khoiro)

Friday, October 2, 2009

How to Be Confident?


How to Be Confident?
Combined 3M
In the daily slang, confident that we mean self-confidence. Everyone really had a problem with this one term. There were people who felt he had lost his sense of confidence in almost all areas of his life. Problems may be related to the crisis itself, depression, loss of control, feeling helpless at the side of a bright future, and others. There are also people who feel not confident with what he was doing or with what practiced. There are also people who feel less confident when facing certain situations or circumstances. Based on the practice of life, we can say that the latter is normal in the sense that experienced by all humans.
Actually, what we mean by the term that confident? If you look at the scientific literature, there are some terms related to this issue pls. Here I just want to mention just four:
 Self-concept: how do you conclude yourself as a whole, how do you see your self-portrait as a whole, how you yourself mengkonsepsikan as a whole.
 Self-esteem: how far you have positive feelings about yourself, how far you've got something that you feel is valuable or worthy than yourself, to what extent you believe that something of value, dignity or self worth in your
 Self-efficacy: the extent to which you have confidence in your own capacity to be able to perform tasks or deal with good results (to succeed). This is called a general self-efficacy. Or also, as far as you believe you are in the field of capacity in handling your particular business. This is called the specific self-efficacy.
 Self-confidence: how far you have belief in your assessment of your ability and how far you can feel the "appropriateness" to succeed. Self confidence is a combination of self-esteem and self-efficacy (James Neill, 2005)
Based on that, we also can make such a conclusion that self-confidence is the effect of how we feel (M1), believes (M2), and knowing (M3). People who have low confidence or have lost confidence in negative feelings toward him, have faith in the ability of his weak and have less accurate knowledge of the capacity they have. When this is associated with the practice of everyday life, people who have low confidence or have lost their faith, tend to feel / behave as follows:
 Does not have something (desires, goals, targets) who fought in earnest
Have decisions  Not a decissive step (floating)
 Easily frustrated or give up when facing problems or difficulties
 Less motivated to get ahead, lazy or half-half
 often fail in perfecting the duties or responsibilities (not optimal)
 awkward in dealing with people
 You can not demonstrate the ability of speaking and listening skills to convince
 Often have unrealistic expectations
 Too perfectionist
 Too sensitive (sensitive)
In contrast, the great confidence, they have positive feelings toward him, had a strong conviction on him and have accurate knowledge of the capabilities of the. People who have good self confidence is not the only person who feels capable (but really can not afford) but is a person who knows that he can based on experience and calculation.
Various studies and experience have explained that a person's self confidence associated with the two most fundamental things in our life practice. First, the confidence associated with how a person fighting for his desire to achieve something (achievement or performance). It's like Mark Twin said: "What do you need to achieve is to have a full commitment and confidence. "
Second, the confidence associated with a person's ability in dealing with problems that hinder the struggle. People who trust his good will tend to conclude that he was "bigger" than the problem. Conversely, people who have low self-esteem will tend to conclude that the problem is much bigger than himself. Recognized this as Mohammad Ali. "The only thing that makes people run away from the challenge is the weakness of self-confidence."
Conclusion Bandura (Dr. Albert Bandura, 1994), explained that self-efficacy had a great big contribution to the motivation of a person. These include among others: how one merumukan goals or targets for itself, the extent to which people struggle for that goal, how strong it was able to overcome those problems, and as tough as what men could face failure.
Not only Bandura such a conclusion. Education experts have pitched the same conclusion. Self-efficacy would be a good one critical success (students) in carrying out their duties. They better have the mental readiness to learn, more had a strong incentive to work harder, more resilient in overcoming adversity and better able to reach the level of higher performance (Pajares & SCHUNK, The Development of Achievement Motivation, San Diego: Academic Press, 2002. ).

Negative sides
Normally it can be said that all people want to have a high confidence or strong. This is for example related to the two things we've discussed in advance. There is only one thing we need to watch out that there are some negative sides behind the high confidence that. Negative sides of this we need to manage so as not to produce proportional attitudes and behaviors that harm or damage. Among the negative side are:
 Arrogance. We put other people down (looking down or humiliate) for being higher or above. Such arrogance is rejected by all the values in this world. Justified we feel more than others but the important thing here is not until we look down on others, let alone to insult both in words and deeds.
 Feeling self-righteous and can not accept other people's truths. Sometimes there are reasons to feel right but we need to watch out for is the emergence of the true feelings that make us conclude all the wrong people. Even if we are right but if we felt that everyone else is wrong, it can make us wrong.
 Reject the opinions of others / unable to hear other people's opinions, suggestions of others, do not want to take lessons from the experiences of others or stubborn (stubbornness). Opinions of others is not all we need to listen but not everything needs to be rejected. There are positive things that we can take the opinions of others. It is said, one factor that makes the business collapsed after the triumph is for refusing to listen to opinions of others, refusing to learn from others, being flexible to change. They become covered with glory during this experience.
 Having a model of aggressive communication, authoritarian-style force, or without empathy. Communication model that often lead to poor quality of the relationship "Sincere", as well as invite more conflict, opposition or resistance. Instinctively, someone else will be more comfortable when approached with a model of empathic communication, assertiveness, or persuasive.
 Lack of calculation of the potential hazards or lack of attention to things that detail. Stand up to the challenge, have high confidence in the ability to overcome problems or to think "beyond the technique" is indeed a positive and necessary. But if it makes us accustomed to trivialize, underestimate or Careless, reckless, and similar, of course dangerous.
 Lack of capacity to trust other people or too perfectionist in judging others. Not easy to trust other people talk or do not easily trust other people an explanation for its ability before any evidence is real, this is needed. There are times when we can not 100% trust other people. But it would be a problem if we can not trust anyone else for all things, can not delegate to others for all the work, always underestimate, always wanted to be a "police" on others, and similar, this could distress yourself.
 Have the self-assessment "over", fixing the remuneration is too high, demanding to be treated too idealistic. Legitimate self-assessment we have a once sky-high, set the "price" as high, but if it makes our lives narrow, then we need to create an alternative thinking and learn to be flexible. Do not let us break our fault too hard. Do not let all that we can not distinguish between knowing yourself and do not know themselves in practice. The difference is very thin.
Negative sides that I mentioned above we might call the term "too confident". This is also different from the confident. According to the rules which apply in the practice of life, something that was so, it is usually considered bad and ugly.
Build Confidence

For some of us who have issues around low self-esteem or feel has lost confidence, maybe you can make the following steps as the process of exercise:
1. Creating a positive self-definition.
Steve Chandler says, "The best way to change your belief system is to change the definition of yourself." How menciptkan positive self definition. Among the ways that we can do is:
o Create a positive conclusion about yourself / create a positive opinion about yourself. Positive here means that can encourage or who can build, not a destructive or destructive.
o Learning to see the positive parts / extra / power we have
o Open a dialogue with yourself about the positive things we can do, from the smallest and from the start that we can do today.
In addition, you need to do is to stop negative self-opinion that emerged, such as I do not have anything extra, my life is not worth it, I only burden on the community, and so on. After we stop, our task is to replace it with a positive, constructive and motivatif. This requirement is only the beginning and not enough to build confidence.
2. Fight for a positive desire
Next is to formulate programs / self-improvement agenda. This might look like has a new target that we wish to achieve or formulate positive steps we want to do. Whether it's big or small, the point should be no change or improvement to a more positive direction. The more positive things (targets, goals or desires) that we can achieve, the more confident we are stronger. We need to remember that in the end we will only become better by doing something good for us. Period. No one can change this principle.
3. Troubleshooting positively
Pede also be strengthened by providing proof to ourselves that we had managed to overcome the problems that afflict us. The more problems we could solve, the more stronger pede. Over time we become people who are not easily insecure when facing problems. Because there is a reminder that, once we've used to using tactics resignation or lose, this will be a habit that makes us often problematic.
4. Base has a positive decision.
If we read from the practice of life as a whole, there is no one who is always confident of his ability in dealing with problems or in creating desire. Class people who have had Mahatma Gandhi shaky when suddenly changing reality unexpected. But, Gandhi had a way that we can imitate: "When I was desperate so I always remember that throughout history, the way of truth and love always wins. There are several tyranny and murder of a quick win but finally seemed to lose. Think I'm saying this, ALWAYS ". That is, trust Gandhi grow again after remembering that his pace was based on the principles of right.
5. Have a model / example of the positive
What matters more is to find someone else who can we trust the example of him. This indeed requires us to often opened my eyes to see others who are better than us and make it as a lesson. So the importance of the role of these other people, some say that we can improve ourselves of two things: a) personal experience (experiencing life) and b) duplicating (copying and studying other people). Prove it! Good luck.
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The nature of beauty and good looks


The nature of beauty and good looks

1. Eat and drink sufficiently

To be beautiful and handsome, and brotherly akhwat not eat casually / pleases with greed, but ate the extent to enforce the bones to get the power in running the daily activities well.

Remember the word of God Almighty.: "Eat and drink, do not limit berlebih-lebihan/melampaui. For Allah loves not those who exaggerated." (Q. S. Al Araaf 7: 31). Then explained in a hadith: 'From Ibn `Umar from the Prophet. His saying:" Those who disbelieve ate with seven stomachs, and the believers to eat with a stomach. "(Reported by Muslim).

Messenger of Allah. avoid eating and excessive drinking. He ate and drank only when stomach feels hungry and fill the stomach in three parts, one third for food, one third for drink, and a third for breathing. Result is usually easy to eat a lot of obesity, susceptible to disease, tend to worship lazy, lazy work. etc..

2. Aim Sports

So beauty / handsomeness that God Almighty. bestowed on us can be maintained, try always fit physical condition through exercise according to interest / age respectively. Arrange the time on the sidelines of an existing activity. In a hadith explained: "The strong believer is better and more beloved to Allah than the weak believer." (H. R. Muslim).

With exercise, God willing, our bodies can better preserved, so that these conditions can help brotherly / akhwat perform tasks of daily routine with energetic.

3. Maintain cleanliness

All you need is kept clean all the members of the body and clothing. Bukhari hadith declares: "Go take a shower on Friday and although you do not keramaslah in junub and wear perfume" fragrances difference between the Ikhwan and akhwat there, namely: From Abu Hurairah ra, he said: Perfume is the man who smelled the aroma and does not appear color and perfume women are looking color and not smell the fragrance. "(Tirmidhi and An-Nasai). Ikhwan / akhwat should be able to maintain the appearance of the smell of sweat is not good.
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Also in the hadith reported by Bukhari and Muslim are explained cleanliness by keeping one's body of five cases including the nature, namely circumcision, shaving the pubic hair, plucking the armpit hairs, cutting the nails, and shortened the mustache.

To clean clothes, and Nasai Imam Ahmad narrates from Jabir ra hadts, he said: "Allah's Messenger.'ve Visited me. When he saw a man by the clothes worn and tattered, he recalled: Apparently he did not have soap to wash clothes It. " In this hadith, the Prophet. not like someone who meet and hang out with other people wearing dirty clothes and worn as long as he could wash and clean.

Messenger of Allah. teaches us that the clothes of a Muslim should always be neat clean drafts, so that looks delicious in the eye. Of course, these clothes do not have the habit of always collecting new clothes especially with the amount of exaggeration, the most important thing is neat and clean, because the clothes that become rizki we really what to no longer be used by themselves.

Dental hygiene and mouth, "Had it not burdensome to my people, I would tell them to bersiwak each time to pray." (H. R. Bukhari and Muslim).
Maintain cleanliness of the hair, the Prophet. He said: "He who has hair, he should respect it (keep it)." (H. R. Abu Daud and Abu Hurayrah r.a.). It means respecting the hair clean, combed, giving fragrance (hair oil), and keep it well. Islam does not like people who let their hair messy / disheveled, dirty, and smelly.






4. Self smoothing

Word of God Almighty.: "Say, who is God forbid that He jewelry out for servants to him and (who are prohibited pulakah) rizki good things?" (Q. S. Al-Araf 7: 32).

In interpreting these verses, Imam Qurthuby said: "Imam Makhul A'ishah narrated from, he recalled:" Once a group of friends waiting for the Messenger of Allah. in front of the door. When he was about to come out to them, he mirrored in the water in the vessel in the house. After he smoothed his hair and beard, I (Aisha) said: "You do this, O Messenger of Allah?" "Yes, if someone would see his brother let him straighten himself. For verily Allah is beautiful and loves beauty," replied the Prophet. "

Each person needs to maintain the neatness of her, not letting themselves in a wrinkled and ragged appearance with the excuse to zuhud. Messenger of Allah. themselves recommend groomed, but he was the most tawadhu and zuhud.
So, as long as it does not memperapi excessive self, God Almighty. suggested, "O son of Adam, wear beautiful clothes at every (enter) mosques, to eat and drink and be not extravagant. for Allah loves not those who exaggerated. Say:" Who prohibited the jewels of God, who issued for the servants to him and (who are prohibited pulakah) rizki good things? "Say:" All that (provided) for the believers in the life of the world, especially (for them) on the Day of Resurrection. Thus do we explain this passage for those who know. "(Surat al-Araf 7: 31-32).
But a Muslim woman should not tabaruj. God Almighty. has banned tabaruj through Q.S. An-Nur 24: 60 and Q.S. Al-Ahzab 33: 59. According to Ibn Kathir, tabaruj means women who go out and walk / expose myself in front of men (tabaruj ignorance). According to Bukhari, tabaruj is an act of a woman who revealed her beauty to others, and according Muqatil tabaruj is a woman who let her veil, revealing a necklace and bracelet.

Also true Muslim woman is always aware and remember the concept of attitude tawazun (mid / balance) in all things, do not get dressed up / spruce or exaggerated self-measure performance based on material wealth. "Woe to the dinar and dirham slave and slave silk and velvet. If he was given a favor, he was happy and if not given he hated." (H. R. Bukhari).

The latter, in order to look ikhwan / akhwat can be beautiful and handsome should be complemented by the maintenance of common elements with the science of the mind. Indeed, not all people have the intelligence and equal opportunity. However, brotherly / akhwat should always seek and ask for additional knowledge to Allah., As explained in the word of God Almighty., "And Say," Ya Rabbi, add to knowledge. "(Surah Taha 20: 114). In a hadith , A'ishah said: "The best of Ansar women are women. They are not shy to ask in order tafaquh fiddin (deeply religious problems). "(Bukhari, Muslim).
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Therefore, a need still sought is a concern to always try to add / understanding / practice of Islamic science bit by bit, the process of seeking knowledge until the end of life, because it will be the basis and do one's thinking. Similarly, other science, we learned as a means bertaqarrub (draw near) to God Almighty. So that, God willing, with the integrated elements of the heart, body / physical, and science in themselves and akhwat comrade, good looks and beauty we can bring salvation of the world and the hereafter. Allaah Bishshawab Nature.

O Allah, make light in my heart, light in my grave, the light in front of me, light behind me, light on my right, light on my left, light above me, light below me, light in my hearing, light in my sight, light on the hair, the light on my skin, light in my flesh, light in my blood, light in my bones. O God, besarkanlah me light and give me light and make me light the light and add me, add me light, add me light. Aamiin.
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Thursday, October 1, 2009

Start to Married


Start to Married


Marriage means having love and cooperation, giving priority to the interests of others and sacrifice, peace and mawaddah, noble spiritual relationship and attachment disyari'atkan bodies.
Marriage means a pole house is Adam and Hawwa, and from them formed families and descendants, and the houses, then community, then come the various nations and countries. In this case, Allah Subhanahu wata'ala says, meaning, "And He (also) who created man from water, then He made man (a) offspring and mushaharah." (al-Furqan: 54).

Mushaharah of familial relationships caused by the bonds of marriage, such as law, laws, laws, and so on.
Marriage is the fortress that can suppress one's sexual wildness, pushing syahwatnya desire, genitals and honor guard and prevent him from keterjerumusan into disobedience holes and nests of indecency.
We see how the Qur'an evoke in each other couples a sense that they each need each other and improve each other's shortcomings.

Indeed women are branches of men and boys is the root for a woman. Therefore, the root is always needed twigs and branches are always requires root. "On this, Allah Subhanahu wata'ala says, means," He Who created you from a single self and from it He created his wife, so he was pleased with him. "( al-raf: 189).
What is meant by self is one which meant Adam and his wife is Hawwa. Therefore, marriage in Islam is not merely maintain the integrity of the human species, but more than that is running the command of Allah Subhanahu wata'ala as in his word, that is, "So women marry (other) that you like." ( An-Nisa `: 3)
Under the auspices of the Islamic teachings, the two married couples live their lives in kesenyawaan and unity in all things; unity of feeling, unity of heart and encouragement, unity of ideals and destiny and others.
Among the greatness of the Qur'an and its perfection, we see all these meanings, whether they had counted or not, reflected in a verse of the Koran, namely: "They are clothing for you, and you are clothing for they are. " (al-Baqarah: 18)
Meaning Sakinah, Mawaddah and Rahmah
The Qur'an has described the relationship instincts and feelings between husband and wife as one of the signs of God and the infinite pleasure of Him. Allah Subhanahu wata'ala says, means, "And among the signs of His power is that He created for you wives from jenismu itself, so you tend to be and feel reassured him, and made him think of you love and affection. Lo in that really there are signs for those who reflect. " (ar-Rum: 21)

Tendencies and a sense of peaceful husband to his wife and sticking with her husband's wife is a thing which is in accordance with the nature and instincts. This verse is the foundation of life is filled with an atmosphere so cool feeling. The wife is like a husband and shelter, after a struggle all day to get a bite of rice, and find comfort after infestation feeling tired and tired. And, in the last round, all dumped into keletihannya that this shelter. Yes, to his wife who must accept it with a full sense of love, a cheerful face and smile. It was then, her husband got her ears that hear well, heart of compassion and gentle words recalled.

Profile shalihah woman confirmed it was created through the goal, that of the peace for a man with all the meanings embodied in the word "Peace (vegas) it. And, in order for a peace worth saying, then he (she) must have some criteria, among Most importantly; owner feels like to see him; Ability to maintain family and possessions; not let people who oppose him stay with her.

Associated with ar-Rûm letter, paragraph 21 above, there are some reflections:
First Meditations
Abu al-Hasan al-Mawardy said about the meaning, "And He made between you affection and love." (ar-Rum: 21). In the verse there are four opinions: First, that the meaning Mawaddah (feel the love) is al-Mahabbah (love), while the meaning of Rahmah (compassion) is the ash-Syafaqah (pity). Secondly, that the meaning Mawaddah is al-Jima '(sexual intercourse) and Al-Rahmah is Walad (child). Third, that the meaning of loving someone Mawaddah is large (the older) and Rahmah is mercy to the child (the younger). Fourth, that means they are berkasih mutual affection between couples. (al-Mawardy: an-Nukat Wa al-'Uyûn)

Ibn Kathir said, "Among His signs that show the greatness and perfection of His power, He created woman to be your partner from your own kind, so you tended and peaceful to him. If he makes all the Children of Adam (humans) were male men and women made from other types in addition to them, as if coming from the Jinn or animals, it would not have happened unity of hearts between them and the spouse (wife), even contrary to flee, when the couple came from another species. Then, in the perfection of His mercy unto the Children of Adam, He made them partners of their own kind and make among them a sense of love (mawaddah), which is love and compassion (mercy), compassion. Because it could be a man man tied the woman for love or love for him to get a descent from him or she (the woman) takes him in terms of income or proximity to the liver occurs between them, and so forth "(Tafsir Ibn Kathir)
Reflections into two
Let us briefly renungi his word, "from jenismu own." Wife is a noble human being where there is equality between himself and the kind of husband, while men have a degree Qiwâmah (kepempimpinan) for women (read: al-Baqara: 228).
Husband's leadership is not acting authoritarian means silencing the opinion of others (wives, red). His leadership was like a traffic sign regulating travel but not to let him go. Therefore, male leadership does not mean eliminating the role of women in the opinion and assistance in raising a family.
Meditations to Three
Security, peace and stability can bring salvation to the children of every thing that threatens their existence and make them deviate and far from the straight path, because they grow up in an 'institution' that is clean, there is no fraud or interference, in it has been clearly the rights and way of life, each individual doing his duty as the word of the Messenger of Allaah 'alaihi wasallam, "Each of you is leader and every leader responsible for the lead."
Leadership has been determined and each individual is willing to others by not doing things that exceed the limit. This is the meaning of his words in the letter `An-Nisa, verse 34.
Reflections to the Four
Each husband and wife should respect each other opinions. There should be discussion based on compassion, but should not be too long and to the extent an argument. One should also succumb to others opinions especially if one looks the strength of opinion, for an objective discussion of dew sharpened with affection and love will overcome all disasters in order to preserve the life of a happy household.
Meditations to Lima
Sense of love and affection that are embedded as the nature of God wata'ala Subhanahu between spouses will increase in line with good increases in both. On the other hand, will decrease as the decrease in the goodness in them, because naturally, people love people who treat kanya gently and always doing good for him. Well, especially if that person is the husband or wife who between them have a sense of love of Allah Subhanahu wata'ala, that compassion would be increased and strengthened. The Messenger of Allaah 'alaihi wasallam said, "This world is fun and best joy is shalihah woman."
Meditations to Six
The best impression gained from Nabawi households is maintained rights in the husband-wife relationship both during life and after death. This can be seen from the wife of the Messenger of Allaah saying 'alaihi wasallam dear,' A'isha radi 'anha who was jealous of Khadija radi' anha, his first wife when he had died and had never seen. It was simply because he often remember the good and services.
May Allah Subhanahu wata'ala make Muslims households households that are always filled with vegas, mawaddah and mercy. And this can be realized, when the Muslims back to the teachings of their Prophet and copying his domestic life.

Source: al-hayah Tsulâtsiyyah az-Zawjiyyah: as-Sakan al-Mawaddah, ar-Rahmah ibn Muhammad Dr.Zaid work ar-Rummany. (Abu Hafsa)
Netter Al-Sofwa a glorified Allah, the Exalted, Delivering the Truth is the duty of every Muslim. Our current opportunity to preach is to deliver this newsletter to our brothers who do not know. May Allah the Exalted Replying 'Amal Ibadah Kita. Aamiin

ten Mistakes In Educating Children

Ten Mistakes In Educating Children



By Muhammad ibn Ibrahim Al-Hamad
Children are the mandate for both parents. So, we as parents are responsible for this mandate. Not a few errors and omissions in educating children has become a real phenomenon. It was a great disaster; and including betrayed trust God.
As for the house, was the first school for the children. Collection of several houses that will form a community building. For a child, before getting education in schools and communities, he will get education at home and family. He is the prototype of both parents in social interaction. Therefore, this is where the role and responsibility of parents, sued for not negligent in educating the children.

Delinquent Hazard Educate Children In

Parents have a right must be carried out by children. Similarly, children also have rights that must be borne by both parents. Besides God commands us to devote to both parents. God also commanded us to do good (deeds) to the children and seriously educate. Such discharge part of the mandate of God. Conversely, neglect of their rights including the treasonous acts against the mandate of God. Many texts are mengisyaratkannya syar'i. He said.

"It means: Allah commands you to convey trust entitled to receive them" [An-Nisa: 58]

"It means: O ye who believe, do not betray Allah and the Messenger (Muhamamd) and (also) do not betray the messages entrusted to you, and ye know" [al-Anfal: 27]

Prophet alaihi wa sallam said:
"It means: Each of you is leader and accountability will be asked to lead. So, a priest is the leader and be responsible for the lead. A husband is the leader for his family and responsible for the lead "[Hadith Bukhari History]

"It means: Any person given a mandate by God to lead and then he died (while in) the day he died in circumstances that betray amanahnya, Allah forbid heaven bagianya" [Hadith Bukhari History]
While many parents know, that educating children is a big responsibility, but there are still many parents who neglect and underestimate this problem. So ignore this child's education problem, not the least concerned with the development of children.
Only later, when the children disobedience, against the parents, or deviate from the rules of religion and social order, many parents begin to panic or even blame the child. Tragically, many are not aware, that his parents are actually the main cause was the emergence of rebellious attitude.

Negligent or wrong in educating the child many different forms; that we unknowingly contribute to the emergence of rebellious attitude to parents, and juvenile delinquency.

Here are ten of error is often done by parents in educating their children:

[1]. Growing Fear And The Child minder
Sometimes, when the children cry, we frighten them to stop crying. We fear them with images of ghosts, jinns, the sound of wind and others. Impact, the child will grow up to be a coward: Scared of her own shadow, afraid of something that was not to be feared. For example fear into the bathroom alone, afraid to sleep alone because often heard stories about ghosts, spirits and others.

The most severe and unconsciously, we have been instilling fear to himself. Or for example, we are worried when they fell and there was blood on his face, hands or knees. And should we be calm and smiling face appeared frightened child. Not just to frighten him, slapped his face, or scold him and making a big deal. As a result, the children crying harder, and will be used to being scared when see blood or feel sick.

[2]. Being educated snob, Long Tongue, Congkak Against Others. And That Perceived as brave attitude.
This error is the opposite the first point. The truth is to be the middle, not excessive and no minus-cut. Dare not have to be cocky or arrogant to others. However, courageous and harmonious place if indeed the fear that something to be feared. For example: fear to lie, because he knew that if God does not like the kid who likes to lie, or the fear of a dangerous beast. We educate our children to be brave and not afraid of the truth in practice.

[3]. Kids familiarize Life spree, luxury, and Bermewah-snob.
With this habit, the child can grow into children who love luxury, like having fun. Only a selfish, no matter the circumstances of others. Educating children like this can damage the nature, killing attitude in being zuhud istiqomah in the world, membinasakah muru'ah (self) and truths.

[4]. Always Meet Demand Children
Some old people there who always wants to give every child, regardless of the good and bad for the children. Yet, not every child who wants it useful or appropriate to the age and needs. For example the child asked for a new bag is a trend, when only a month ago parents bought him a new bag. This will only spend money. If the child met all permintaanya used, then they will grow into a child who does not care about the value of money and hard for a living. And they will be people who can not spend the money properly.

[5]. Always Meet Demand Son, When Crying, especially small children.
It often happens, our children still ask for something small. If we reject it for some reason, he will force or his gun, which is crying. Finally, parents will soon meet the demands of compassion or to the child immediately stopped crying. This can cause the child to be weak, whiny and did not have identity.
[6]. Too Hard And Stiff In Facing Them, Exceed within reasonable limits.
For example, by hitting them until the bruising, scold him with a shout and scold, or in ways other hard. This sometimes happens when the children do wrong intentionally. And he (probably) only once did.
[7]. Too Pelit In Children, Exceed within reasonable limits
There are also parents who are too stingy to her children, until their children feel less fulfilled needs. In the end encourages children to find their own money with the kinds of ways. For example: by stealing, begging to others, or in other ways. What's worse, there are parents who would entrust their children to the orphanage to reduce the burden themselves. In fact, there is also a bear to sell her child, because it was not able to pay to live. Naa'udzubillah mindzalik

[8]. No Loving And Menyayangi They, so that Made Them Love Outside Looking To Find The house searched.
Such phenomena are happening. Has caused the children fall into the free-association-waiyadzubillah. A girl for example, because it does not get attention from his family he was seeking attention from men outside the family circle. He was glad to get attention from men, because often praised, flirting and so on. Until he was willing to give false honor for love.

[9]. Taking into account only physical needs Only.
Many parents think that they have to give the best for their children. Many parents feel that providing a good education, food and drink nutritious, good clothes and school quality. Meanwhile, there is no attempt to educate their children properly so that religious and noble. Parents forget that children are not given enough material only. The children also need attention and affection. If love is not in getting her home, then he will seek it from someone else.

[10]. To assume good too Son-son
There are some parents who always assume good faith for their children. Think, if their children well and felt no need to worry about, never checked on his children, not knowing a close friend of her son, or whatever activities. Really believe in their children. When a sudden, found her son hit disasters or aberrant symptoms, such as drug exposed, then startled parents. Trying to cover it up and immediately forgave him. Finally, the remaining hanyalan useless regrets.

Thus the ten mistakes that parents often do. We may also not realize when you do it. For that, let's try to keep up their knowledge, especially relating to children's education, so that we avoid mistakes in rearing children, which can be fatal to their future. We always pray, may our children grow up to be righteous and shalihah generation and noble. Bishshawab Allaah knows best.

[Adapted by Umm Shofia of the book At-Taqshir Fi Tarbiyatil Aulad, Al-Mazhahir Subulul Wiqayati Wal Ilaj, Muhammad bin Ibrahim Al-Hamad]